So I needed to take a few days off last week and now I am back. And by take some days off, I mean take a mental and physical break. This is something that happens every once in a while with me. I need to take a break from trying all the time. Trying to be the best athlete, trying to be the best fiance, trying to be the best worker on my team. Sometimes all that trying leads to self destruction. I guess it all goes back to my thoughts a few months ago on how I need to relax and let go a bit, but I never seem to have the time (hello irony), so instead I let myself fall apart a little. By fall apart, I mean I skip a workout and sit on the couch. Or I eat what I want to eat one night and forget about my diet and optimal time to eat things. I just let me be Jessica, and sometimes Jessica does not always do what is best in terms of the rules, but instead does exactly what is needed.
So needless to say, I slacked last week. In every sense of the word, I took two days and just slacked! Work was crazy, so when I had a free moment, I spent it in bed, cuddled up with my dog, watching the Real Housewives, of some unreal location. I went out to dinner and ate pasta, and it was more than an hour after my last workout, and I just didn't care.
The funniest part was, on Friday, while I was still in the self loathing period, I decided to do my hill bounding workout before I taught. I really didn't want to but I figured it would get me to the gym earlier and why not. And about 45 minutes into the run, I had a realization. Why do I doubt myself and let myself self destruct when training is when I feel best? It is the only time when I feel relaxed, like I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. And my answer to that is, who the hell knows?!?! Maybe I need to fall apart to remind myself of that every once in a while.
So I spent the rest of the weekend reconstructing my positive mindset. And it worked. We went down to DC to see some friends on Saturday and on Sunday morning, I made it to the hotel gym right as it was opening. I needed to get in 45 min Tabata drills on the bike, following by a Z1/Z2 1:11 T run. After the bike I was feeling a little sluggish but shrugged it off and got on the treadmill. Now this is where it got strange. I could not get my HR into Z1 forever, and when I finally did, I was at a 8:50 min/mile pace and I was at the bottom of Z1. So after 48 min I had to bring my HR up to Z2. I bumped the pace up to 8:20 min/miles and was able to break into the bottom of Z2 and I stayed there for 23 min. I came out of it with an 8:49 min/mile pace and an average HR of 155, which is 2 beats above the bottom on Z1. I have no idea what happened, but me being me, I figured by Garmin was broken, although it wasn't during the bike ride!
I am not sure if that kind of drop in HR is physically possible, but I am going to just go with it and see what happens this week. As for the next 2 weeks I am gearing up mentally for my first Tri of the season, I will be racing Devilman and I can honestly say I am scared. But there is no turning back, I paid for the event and I am registered and per my dad's advice when I fist started running races, you never sign up and not show up. Once committed you go for it. So that is what I will do!
Now back to my reconstruction.